*this article is purely satirical :) don't get your hopes up
RCHK: A kind donation of 3 million dollars worth of Meta VR equipment sent by Mark Zuckerberg to RAPT has urged the ESF Education Bureau to have online education in RCHK to be integrated into the Metaverse. Instead of using Zoom for online education, classes and school gatherings will be held in a Metaverse server, hosted by a nearby Windows 3.0 McDonald’s cash register. According to Dr Brown in a public statement, online education will be run in a 1 to 1 scale four dimensional replica of classrooms, and will even integrate real life physics simulations into the classrooms.
As expected, such a drastic change has garnered differing opinions from the RCHK community.
“It would be great to see students utilizing this new, modern technology for their education. Not only do I think it may be fun for them, it will also let them focus more in class. In fact, my son who already has a VR and haptic gloves is having a lot of fun with VR - he’s always inside his room with a locked door when he’s using his VR kit!”
Some have expressed worries for the alleged potential risks involved from Meta VR equipment, which range from mild myopia symptoms, radiation poisoning, demonic possession and acne outbreaks. (WebMD, 2022)
Zuckerberg himself has stated in a press conference that he plans to further expand Metaverse online education to a global audience, starting with RCHK as a sort of trial.
“This, uh, this, VR thingamabob is perhaps one of the best means of replicating real-life education, in, uh, in a situation where we must resort to online school.”
Unprovoked, Zuckerberg seemed to feel the need to reassure viewers that he is, in fact, not Zarl’Margoth, the Aztec deity of technological discord and domination.
“Heh, so, uh, on a side note, I’d like to reassure everyone that I am not Zarl’Margoth, the Aztec deity of technological discord and domination. I have some similarities with that monster, but I assure you, I’m not him!” Zuckerberg stated, while nervously licking his lips with what appeared to be a forked tongue.
The Metaverse VR online education is currently in trial, used exclusively by some RCHK student volunteers. It seems to be met with mostly positive reception, although there are some that protest against this campaign.
“WE ARE ONE. WE ARE MANY. WE ARE UNIFIED, ZARL’ MARGOTH IS ALL,” commented a group of RCHK student volunteer protestors in unison while demonic energy poured out of their VR headsets.
It seems as if these students are rallying a demonstration that opposes the transition of online school. The RCHK student volunteers then began vaporizing nearby citizens with pure dark magic and summoned tentacled beasts from the fifth dimension. This is no doubt an act of defiance against the rigid and oppressive capitalist ideologies being enforced by Mark Zuckerberg.
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